Words words words, and too much thinking eating and drinking

It is hard to step outside your own schema to see things from a different culture’s perspective. I have undeniably American roots, and when I say American I don’t use it as they do here in Spain. Here, when people ask where I am from I say ‘estadounidense’, literally that I am from the United States. In my first ventures outside the country (aside from BC) I went to Latin America, where I opted for ‘Americana’, because it was easier to say. But I was routinely corrected; I was not allowed to claim all of North and South America as synonymous with the US. This objection to me is totally understandable from the point of view of the countries constantly in the shadow of the United States. But here in Spain they call me Americana, and I always then specify that I am from the United States.
Why?
Maybe out of respect for the other American countries, to acknowledging their existence by recognizing the separate pieces that make up our continents.
Maybe because of an exaggerated sense of patriotism and a desire for there to be no confusion or ambiguity about my possible country of origin in the Americas.
Maybe I am happy the word ‘estadounidense’ no longer presents itself as a linguistic challenge for me, thus would like to roll it out on all possible occasions.
Maybe I am ready to stand up to anti US sentiment in a way I wasn’t before, due to my age, inexperience and possibly the fact that the Bush administration was in office.
(I will admit when I was in Argentina I was so tired of being told I was a fascist because I was from the US (mostly by cab drivers, to be fair) that I started claiming that I was Canadian)
Maybe the principle of it annoys me-if I had a friend in the US in from Europe and always described them as being ‘European’ as opposed to their country, I would find that to be inadequate. They should too.

That being said, I am American, as in a person that has grown up in the Americas-where at very least we are united by a history of colonization, inhumane treatment of native populations and revolution in the formation of our nations and national psyche. The other day in class my teacher asked me to talk about the 4th of July and how we celebrated it, and then without thinking I asked if their independence day was coming up. But of course, Spain doesn’t have an independence day, because they are the country most of the Americas were becoming independent from. They were celebrating the day that Columbus set sail to conquer new lands-reminding me in an unexpected way of which side of the Atlantic I am on right now.

Here and now Spain is one of the PIGS (Portugal, Italy, Greece and Spain) that are ‘causing problems’ for the rest of Europe. With such an international crowd in the area because of Gibraltar I have heard a number of times something along the lines of ‘this is Spain, they don’t do anything properly/promptly/efficiently/logically/(insert positive adverb here)’. Spain is the underdog. I can’t help but think back on all of the history lessons I took for my minor in ‘Studies of La Raza Latina’- elaborate caste systems in Latin America with a specific name for every possible mixture of Spanish, African and Native blood. They allowed different possibilities in life according to that system, which included reserving the highest positions of power to those actually born in Spain, giving them privilege even over those born of Spanish parents on Latin America soil. Such was the division that women would sail back to Spain to have their babies, and they had to make up a line in the Atlantic because so many babies were being born on the ship ride east. Born past that imaginary line they could be counted as full blooded Spanish and accorded all of the rights associated with this highest of high births. But if mom couldn’t keep her shit together and had the baby off the coast of Florida, well than no luck, your potential in life was just shaved several inches shorter. (Although not nearly as short as that of a mestizo (Spanish/native blend) or god forbid an African person.)

It just feels like a math equation that doesn’t add up right. Or that my perception of Spain is based on a historical perspective without giving adequate weight to its present reality- which is a 25% unemployment rate and an inability to adjust their currency due to their membership in the EU. The rise and fall of nations-where will the US be in 400 years?

On a more day to day note, last night I invited my couch surfing hosts over for dinner which turned into a 11 person dinner party at our place and man oh man did we eat well. My contributions were butternut squash gnocchi sautéed in honey garlic and rosemary, and Berenjena rebozado, or fried eggplant, drizzled with honey and reduced balsamic vinegar. Nom. There was so much food, and so much wine, and at 1 we went out for dancing until 5. We successfully threw an excellent party.